Farewell And Hello
Some of you may know that as of April 5th, LIFEclectic will be closing its doors. It has been an amazing experience to write for this magazine and I am grateful to have had this opportunity. I’ve met so many wonderful, insightful and inspiring...
Some Advice For Talking With An Adoptive Parent
If you’ve been following my blog, you’ll know that I am a transracial, adoptive mom. In many circles a transracial family is also known as a conspicuous family given that the parents are usually one ethnicity and the child another. In...
Adventures In Potty Training
This past Presidents’ Day weekend, my husband and I spent the entire weekend potty training our 2½-year old son, The Littlest E. It’s a rite of passage for every child and parent. For a while our son had showed signs he was interested...
Soul Parenting
Joaquin must have been at least three days old before I’d recovered enough from his arrival to give him a thorough once-over. As I scanned his wrinkled body, I was astounded by his completeness. “All I want is a healthy baby” is a common response...
A Durable Power Of Attorney For Health Care Decisions Is A Good Thing To Have In Place
In the summer of 2009, my father was vacationing in Reno, Nevada and had a heart attack. He’d had one twenty years before and this time the doctor told him he needed quadruple bypass surgery. Prior to his surgery (which had something like a...
Spacation Day – Mom-Me Time Revisited
In one of my first blogs, I wrote about the need for time with myself to regroup and recharge. It was especially important since I was a new, adoptive mom and my son, The Littlest E, was just over a year old. Now that my son is in preschool going...
Children’s Book Review: Shades Of Black
As a transracial, adoptive parent, there are many things my husband and I can share with our son, The Littlest E, unconditional love, nurturing, caring, etc. We can teach him compassion, empathy, how to be a good, loving person, and what we know about...
Childhood Magic
Thanks to the success of Harry Potter, the world has been inundated with children flying around on brooms, black capes fluttering in the wind. Maybe it’s just my imagination, but the number of seven-year-olds waving wands around and proclaiming some...
The Special Bond Between Grandparents And Grandchildren
As a child, my family and I spent part of our winters and summers with Grandma Sara and Grandpa Jack (my mom’s folks) at their home in Windsor Gardens near Denver, Colorado. I have wonderful memories of them. At night, Grandma Sara used to tuck...
Watching Our Words
As parents, we all know to watch what we say around our children, but sometimes it’s easier said than done. The Littlest E is almost 2½ and is quite the sponge and mimic. It’s so cute when he sits at the dinner table trying to emulate...
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High Heels Destroy Love: Love Is Shorter Than 5’11 And Corny!
Thinking about love, relationships, and expectations again. I had a hilarious time at homecoming. I got to see friends from years ago and make new ones. I think about the friendship me and my wife have and the ongoing cultivation of that friendship. I also had a chance to reflect on what brought us together and the elements that can tear us apart. I told some new female friends I’ve made via AY, T,M,T, and…
Morehouse Men
Over the past couple of days, I learned some valuable lessons about friendship, similar experiences and appreciation. I also learned how I did not realize that I had not properly valued my HBCU education and experience. Don’t get me wrong, I valued both, but properly? Probably not. I went back to Atlanta, specifically Morehouse’s homecoming for the first time in 6 years. I missed it and I didn’t realize it until this weekend. I realized…
Mothering to the Other Side: Overcoming Isolated Motherhood
Continuing on the theme of solitude, I am going out of town to attend a friend’s wedding without my daughter. I will say it again: Mama, it is possible. Eventually, you will get your weekend to yourself. I promise. There was a period of time where I was resigned to the idea that I would never again get the opportunity to travel alone or do the things that it seemed everybody else could do because…
Take the Time
I am rarely ever alone. If I’m not with my daughter, then I’m at work. If I’m not at work then I’m training capoiera. If I’m not doing that then I’m with friends. Last night, however, I found myself alone en route to, yes ladies, the spa. Self-care is not only possible, it is absolutely necessary. No matter how feminist or independent we are, mothers still struggle to break out of the “angel of the…
Mompreneur Insights – Interview With Sarah Dale
For this weeks Mompreneur interview I’m very pleased to welcome back Sarah Dale! Sarah is a chartered occupational psychologist, coach, and newly published author of Keeping Your Spirits Up, a book aimed at busy professionals who sometimes struggle to balance work, home and well-being. Click here to read Sarah’s guest post ‘How To Balance Work, Home And Wellbeing For Multi-Tasking Professional Moms’ As a working mother herself, she is very familiar with the challenges of keeping…
My 21st Century Child
Growing up in the ’70s and ’80s, technology was pretty cool (or so we thought). In the ’70s cassettes and VHS became popular, along with arcade and video games. Remember when the video game Pong was a big deal? Yes, I’m dating myself. HBO was born in the ’70s. Wow, a premium cable channel. MTV came along in the ’80s, and they actually played music! Walkman, boom boxes and computers became more commonplace. I went…
Parental Heartbreak: How A Sock Can Bring You To Tears
It’s only a sock, and a tiny one at that. From toe to orange-and-blue striped top, it barely stretches from the heel of my palm to the second knuckle of my middle finger. Yet my eyes start to tear at the sight of it. There’s the green streak where Joaquin, newly walking, stumbled while running down a grassy hill. A brown, kidney-shaped spot reminds me of a bloody torn toenail. Formerly white, afternoons of experimenting…
Testing 1, 2, 3
Near the end of September I had scheduled Sean to have a psychological evaluation. It was part of criteria the county was requesting. As Sean gets older, I’ve come to realize that I need to have steps and measures in place to help him navigate and be as successful as he can be in society. Any type of evaluation with Sean can be difficult at best. Saying that, I must let you know how well he…
Something of Her Own: Dance Class for Daughter
Before I became a mother, I travelled, performed, wrote, and photographed to my heart’s content. In my first year of motherhood, I struggled to keep momentum with any project. I couldn’t seem to get anything off the ground. Not just creative projects, but also generating any income for myself. I didn’t have the time and I didn’t have the childcare. I write a lot about this time because I remember being so disoriented. I couldn’t…
Embarking on Single Motherhood With No Training Wheels
Her first bike had been sitting in the backyard all winter. It was still big for her, so I was reluctant to buy her training wheels and teach her how to ride. After months of collecting rust and dust, I went to take out the garbage and found it was missing. I had no idea how long ago it was stolen. It could have been weeks already. It was the end summer and I was…
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